mother knows..

The sun was well up, this he verified by pinching aside his bedroom curtains and sneaking a quick peep outside. This was to him a daily ritual, for nothing filled him up with sprightly gusto like a bright sunny morning or even just the prospect of one. This was his gauge, his unconventional indicator that the day would turn out just fine. So as he went about a task here and there in preparation for the day, he whistled a tune, actually it that old bobby mc ferrein`s song, `don`t worry be happy`. He had it somewhere in his collection but could not locate it then. Today he would be handling the MCH and as that was one sure drainer, he `stuffed` himself proper, this he began at the house with a glass of cold mango juice and a couple of some cakes, he ended it at the hospital food canteen with hot chapati and beans laced with beef soup. Now he was set and well barricaded against the hunger pangs that would assail him later.
The morning presented to him nothing new that he had not yet encountered before; common respiratory infections, malnutrition and dehydration in their many forms, treatment defaulters and failures are all cases that he dealt with on a daily basis.
The mid morning was usually the heaviest period of the day but a conversation between a subordinate staff and a colleague of his caught his ears and was enough to distract him. It was about the sub`s ineligibility for some vacancies in the department because she was HIV negative. His heart sunk. One week earlier as he had labored to get an IV access on a very sick, he had some how misplaced the first canular he had used. This was compounded by the fact that the safety box had been taken away during the cleaning exercise and had not been returned. A replacement had taken long in coming and as this could not `delay work`, he`d carefully displayed all the sharps on a clean paper in one corner, later he`d dispose them off in the safety box. But this particular one had missed him. This particular subordinate had come to remove the bed sheets which had been soiled by another child and had she not borrowed cotton from him he would have missed the injury she had sustained from the sharp. On further inquiry he had found out it was the missing sharp. Matter of factly he had instructed her to go for post exposure prophylaxis to which she coyly laughed.
He had been newly deployed to the department at the time and had believed she was already infected because she was a peer educator. He had gone about his duties and this event had somehow escaped his attention. Earlier the following week he had remembered and when he`d inquired how she was doing with her medication she had laughed saying she did not take the drugs, this he took it as confirmation she was already infected.
Now here he was learning that she no peer educator and that she was HIV negative or purported to be so...and about two weeks after the incident..
As he lost himself in thoughts and thoughts a day old boy was brought in, not sick but that she had been discovered in a disused pit latrine. On examination he was found to be as sound as is probably possible and this was surprising. The rescuer mother never ceased for a moment to thank God for the wonderful gift of a son(she only had girls) Already she had grand plans for the boy and even had christened him, Blessing. The child had however to be admitted just as a precautionary measure and later she had to go through a lengthy adoption procedure before she `took the son home`. Nothing dampened her cheerfulness. This spectacle had nearly brought activities to a halt in the department as everyone wanted to have a good look at the baby, after which they would curse the real mother..
As matters settled down leaving only a heavy scent of the disgust in the air a lady in her late pregnancy was brought to him. The nurse rapidly explained why she had brought her to him. She had tested HIV positive but had declined any form of intervention to protect the baby from infection. She was a high school teacher and this was her second visit to the clinic. She was due in about three weeks time and what had actually brought her today was a urinary tract infection.
He had spent with her close to half an hour going through all the aspects of her status but she had been adamant she knew what she was doing. She was actually still angry with the husband for having infected her and this she said informed her decision. Could he call this stupid obstinacy? He did not quite place it or did it matter? The point remained what was he to do? The more he tried to convince the more candid she actually got and he knew if this could be equated to a contest then he had been outwitted...a certain irritation crept upon him and he politely asked her to leave but give serious consideration to what they`d discussed. She was reluctant to leave, may be she was on the verge of tears but she showed no trace of it.
`God bless the child` he muttered under his breath as she walked out through the door and as he went back to the rest of his patients a distant sadness descended over him; for those things he could influence but failed to and those courses he could not influence but which he strove to have a hand in.